This is Halloween

Yes I know it has been a decade since I have last written anything. But come on. I got married and then started the first of two hell semesters on campus. So naturally my life has been an onslaught of Organic Chemistry, Physics, and yelling at Comcast. I have missed blogging dearly. Which is why I am back.

Today is September 30^th. Tomorrow begins the month in which my second favorite holiday lies. Halloween! I am a HUGE fan of horror and the occult. I have never really understood why….but for some reason I love it. Absolutely love it. It may or may not stem from watching hours of Unsolved Mysteries as a child…There is nothing better than feeling the autumn air around me, seeing the colors change, and watching a scary movie in a corn field. Oddly enough I hate spook alleys and haunted houses such as Nightmare on 13^th. This however is going to change this year. As I am braving them with my wife and her family. Pray for me.

As a student of neuroscience I am often baffled as to why we love horror so much. Some people are revolted by the season, and yet others are consumed by it. Why do we love that which scares us? Do we want to push our limits? Do we have a dopaminergic response to that which terrifies us? Why? Executions used to be a social spectacle. In a way they still are. Ever turned on your television? We are drawn to darkness. We like being scared. The horror industry is huge. Millions of people venture into it every year. From ten year old's telling tales of Bloody Mary and the Hook Man, to adults watching movies that give us nightmares. Why do we do it?

I think one of the best answers given to this question is done by an incredible close friend Nathanial J. Darkish as he waits for pyramid head. His interpretation of this dilmena is intriguing and true. READ IT! It is quite honestly some of the best psychological bending material I have read. Especially if you have ever experienced what he has. His blog will dive deep into the human mind as it challenges itself on this very issue. He is an aspiring author and your views and comments will help give his works life. In his first essay that he gives us, he dives upon this paradox in a way that makes you question your own psychology. And will make you ask that same question. Why horror? Its brilliant. And I HIGHLY recommend it. (Plus the name of the blog is AWESOME!)

http://partisobscurum.wordpress.com/

Well for now this is it. I will return. I need to. It’s so therapeutic. Enjoy your Halloween season. It’s really the only time of the year where our fears become our friends!

P.s. 900 blog points for reading! An additional 100 if you post what your favorite Halloween past time is.

P.P.S. another 5000 points if you go and read that blog. It is really good stuff. 

"Ralph wept for the end of innocence, the darkness of man's heart"

Sometimes…people suck. They are real ass holes. Who hasn’t met someone who they just want to punch in the face because they are being an idiot? Whether it’s a family member, someone at work, or some moron on the road…we all have those days where we seem to meet the best of God’s dumbest creations. I feel though, that often times we are only looking in a mirror. Looking at something that we ourselves often are. An Asshole.

In William Golding’s book Lord of the Flies, a group of young boys are marooned on an island all by themselves. No parents, no government, no rules. Just themselves. In time, Pandora’s box is opened and chaos and death walk freely amongst the children. One of the central themes of the book is that humans are by nature, carnal, evil, and malicious. This is seen in the descent of these innocent boys from humane to demonic. It is also made manifest in a boars head upon a stake. The Lord of the Flies. Beezlebub, The prince of devils. Who taunts the children, making them realize that their greatest fear, the beast, is in fact themselves. This enigmatic symbol ultimately drives Simon, a representation of spirituality to his own spiritual and physical death.

The themes in this book inspire me. Weird right? This is one of my favorite books of all time, and is a must read for everyone in my opinion. However, there is one thing I completely disagree with about the book. Which in essence is the core of the book. I believe Human beings are inherently good.

I feel that naturally and deep down all humans are brought into this world as good people. I do not believe that some people inherently bring evil with them. In the realm of science there is an extensive battle between what is Nurture and what is Nature. Which of these two opposing forces dictates what we will become. Ask some people and its black and white…all or none. We either are a product of our genetics or a product of our environment. I believe in the color grey. That nature gives us certain anatomy, which can cause certain physiology, which can ultimately lead to certain personalities and dispositions. However, I also believe that the world around us is a very sharp knife.

Once we reach a certain point in our lives I feel that nature sort of dies, and we become subject to the knife of nurture. We react to situations by what we have seen others react like. We mirror what our surroundings teach us. Sure we have different personalities, beliefs, ideals, morals, and genetic variances that make us truly unique. But at the core, we all have been shaped with what the world has given us. Making some people bad, and others good.

I am so inspired by Golding’s book, due to the apocalyptic tale he tells. That humans are evil. He demonstrates that without laws we will be destroyed by our own beasts. And if this wickedness is not contained it will consume us. What I pull from the book is to fight against it. Recognize when we are being malicious and change it. We can’t force people to change who they are, but I STONGLY believe that we can be instruments of good in the world. We heal from the scars that the knife has left in us and we can be different. We don’t have to be depressed or rude and mean. We can change. We have control.

Sometimes though I think I am too optimistic. I have people in my life who wear me down. They make stupid mistakes and think that their life is out of their control. I want to ring his neck. Tell him to shut the hell up, and make the decision. Take his life, and make the best of it. Put off the negativity and choose to be happy. I tell him this over and over and over and over and over and over and over. Do they listen? For a couple of months. Then the descent back into Dante’s inferno begins again. Not just for him. But the people who his actions affect. We are his Dante and he is our Virgil. Dragging us with him…. down the circles of his personal hell. And all of us are raged and stormed by the tempest of those deep circles of hell.

I am writing this post, not for him. Not for myself. But for those people who day by day choose their destiny. They choose to be good. Thank you. Thank you to all the mothers who put up with their children’s shit day after day. Who hide their scars of sadness from the world. Thank you to the dads who struggle to make ends meet, but who still take time out of their day to play with those who they love. Thank you to the sisters who hold on, and have a faith in something that the rest of us have troubles with. Thank you to the friends who listen without bigotry or hate. Thank you to the lovers, who bare the burdens of their partners.

Thank you to the people in the world who are trying to make a difference. I have had a very hard week. Then I meet people around me, at work, at school, in the store, and all around me. It gives me courage to look into the Lord of Flies and yell at him. Scream at him that I am better. To overcome my personal darkness and fight for myself to be a good person. To choose the right in more ways than a religious one.

What inspires me? Good people. Not only who they are, but what they choose to overcome each and every day. To all of you who inspire me. Thank you. I would be lost forever on an island without you.

 

P.S. 5000 blog points ;)

Another Pediatric Rant.



Yup.

Yup. Here is another one. A rant about the inner workings of the pediatric world. You sick of these yet? Tough. I work in a pediatric office. What do you expect? Deal with it. I sometimes hate when I just blog-rant. But it is so stress relieving. So you may just have to deal with one more of these. Sorry.

Just a heads up. I am not a parent. Probably won’t be for awhile. But where I work I see parents in action and sometimes it makes me sick. So this is an opinion. On what I consider “Bad Parenting” to be. Don’t agree? That’s fine.

First off… minor rant of sorts. If you have children and you take them to a public place…PLEASE clean up after them. I swear I have cleaned up poop on walls before in my office. Sometimes I walk into a room ready to clean it for the next patient and it is like 3 little tornados have gone through the room. Crumbs are everywhere, it smells like rank diaper, our books are destroyed, and walls are colored. How in hells sake can you just let your children run amuck and destroy other people’s property. Had I done that as I child I would be punished faster than you swat at a mosquito. It is ridiculous how inconsiderate some people are. GAH! Fix it future parents. Its pathetic.

Now the major rant. Put your big kid pants on. This might get crazy. Every now and then we get children who are spawn of Satan. Hellians. Demons. They scream and kick and yell and bite. (yes we have had people bitten) Just the joys of working with kids right? WRONG! I honestly believe that behavior is learned. Yes genetics take a role in certain things, but in this regard I am 100% nurture. (Unless there is physical brain deformities or problems...but that’s a whole other post)

About 110% of the time these children have parents who baffle me. While their child is screaming at me while all I want to do is weigh them….they sit there and are playing “Angry Birds”. Or they sooh and cooh to the child and say in the sweetest voice possible “it’s all right.” I understand that we are kind of a traumatizing place to be at. I get that. But this goes deeper then freaking out about getting a shot and crying.

How my patients acted today, and how I feel about this topic...

 

What I am talking about is these kids learn the system. If they throw a fit they will get away with it. They become entitled. If I don’t get what I want, I will throw a fit until I get what I want. Mom and Dad aren’t going to do anything about it. Then when I get what I want I will be the cute little angel my parents are conditioning me not to become. Soon I am a terror and when they can’t control me they will blame it on ADD. (once again a WHOLE other post that I will not even mention at the moment.)

 

For me I hate this. I think it stems a lot of problems in society. I think this form of pediatric entitlement eventually morphs into bullying, and other adolescent issues. Procrastination and street youths (if you get the New Girl reference you are a rock star) thinking they are better then everyone else. There is an article on KSL that is BOOMING with comments about a group of cheerleaders from Highland. They are upset because they are being kicked off the cheerleading team because they had 18 UNEXCUSED ABSENCES! Eighteen. Not two. Almost Twenty. What ever happened to consequences and accepting that sometimes you don’t get everything you want? Here is the article. Its ridiculous how many parents are defending them saying that the school is in the wrong. What the hell!?

 

http://www.ksl.com/index.php?nid=148&sid=24568907\

 

The point I guess that I am trying to get at with this post is aimed at parents. Don’t let your kids control you. They need to learn responsibility. If you do not teach them that by act and deed. Through punishment and example. They will never learn. And they will grow up to be bullies and Highland Cheerleaders. Like I said earlier…I am not a parent. But I have INCREDIBLE examples all around me. One thing they have in common…their children behave. Why? Because they don’t put up with their crap. Be proactive. Care about the future of your children. What we do when out kids are 2 and 3 can have a profound impact on their lives. Make sure it is the right impact.

ugh....too true.

 

 

 

P.S. this is a long one. Sorry. Very close topic that I see on a daily basis. What do you think about the whole issue?

 

P.P.S 2000 blog points for reading. This one was brutal.

Youtube Friday #5

I don't think I even need to explain why I am posting this. But I will. Only because I rock. Catching Fire is my favorite of this incredible series. And this movie trailer looks like it will not disappoint!!!

Waahooo!  

 

 

This movie will blow my mind away. So excited.

Youtube Friday #4

This week on My Youtube Friday is the "Ghost Poop Story!" If this doesn't make you laugh then you have no soul. This man is a genius story teller. His other stuff is quite hilarious as well!

 

 

P.S. If you find anything that blows your mind on Youtube let me know. I love a good youtube video...

 

:D

 

Music and the Imperius Curse

Sorry it has been awhile since I have blogged. I have been busy planning the wedding of the century and time escapes you. Luckily have saved a few ideas that I have been floating around in my brain….this should allow me to blog a little bit more consistently for a bit! Whoop.
 

This post is another one about music. I love music. A lot. Who doesn’t!? Crazy people. However this post isn’t about songs I love or bands who have incredible lyrics…it’s about something that I have been wondering about for a bit and I would like to see some other peoples opinion on the matter.

 

The question at hand is…can music make us do things? Can repetition of a certain style of music or hearing certain lyrics alter our decisions and make us do stuff. In essence, can music control our minds? How many bands have been attacked for being “the devil’s music?” or “Brainwashing music…”

 

I completely agree with the fact that music can influence our mood. When I am pissed I will listen to certain songs that help me vent that anger. When I am emotional I have certain songs that help me come out of the slump. I think this aspect of music is incredible and is very healthy for the crazy journey that is life. However I don’t think that by doing this the music is making me act in a certain way…or is it?

 

I have started pondering this with the large amount of crazy music on the radio at the moment. Primarily Miley Cyrus’s crazy new song “We Cant Stop.” (the music video will ghive you nightmares…Hannah Montana is truly dead) A song that basically tells its listeners that it doesn’t matter what you do because the only person who can judge who is god. Then you have the onslaught of “life is a party” lyrics in singers like Ke$ha. Who basically tell the world that life is a party and that we shouldn’t need to grow up… This also compliments Avril Lavignes new hit as well.

 

After watching the new music video....

 

 

Don’t get me wrong…I thoroughly enjoy these songs. But to me they are just fun songs. I listen to the real lyrics and I wouldn’t want my future children embracing the themes of the songs. It would ruin their lives. Does that happen though? Do we let music become so much a part of us that we start to let it influence our decisions? How many punk rock songs talk about suicide and then when kids kill themselves we blame a song. How is that even possible?    

My opinion is that all men have agency. The ability to choose our destiny. I don’t think that music makes us do things. I think it can influence our mood and our attitude. But I don’t think it makes us act a certain way. With this is mind, I think I am able to enjoy music a lot more, as I am not so caught up in the “brainwashing” of the song. I mean The Beatles were thought to cause brainwashing, and is there really a better band then the Beatles!?

 

Random and fragmented post…but comes from the soul. Let me know if you disagree or agree. I would like to get other peoples opinions on this!

 

I just thought is was absolutely hilarious....

P.S. 900 points if you state your opinion. Plus I will give you 3 high fives next time I see you! ;)

Youtube Friday #3

This week is something chill. I am madly in love with this song. And this cover version of it is 500'xs better. Let me know what you think!!!!

Don't know why but its awesome!

P.S. Real post coming tomorrow!